Results of Both Hands Fundraiser

In our last blog post, we wrote all about how the Both Hands Project went for our work day at Miss Beverly's home. I will always look back on that day with a fond remembrance of God's working! I especially loved doing this as a fundraiser because the work itself was a service. I felt like a fundraiser like this helped us to keep a right perspective, not focusing only on ourselves and our family. It is a reminder that God is at work in so many other ways, far beyond the dwelling of our home sweet home.

As much of the purpose of this blog is to keep friends, families and future adoptive families updated and informed on how this adoption process works, I would like to take a few minutes to describe the process of this fundraiser and the financial outcome of the project.

Let me just start with this: The fundraising outcome of our project was absolutely astounding! Including Lifesong's $3000 matching grant, we raised just over $8000 from this project!! 

Dave and I prayerfully considered how we should approach the "fundraising portion" of this adoption process. Honestly, because God has blessed us with the opportunity of Dave being a pastor at our church, we wanted to be very careful with how we proceeded. We would never ever want to put people in a position where they felt obligated to support us in this pursuit. 

By God's grace, He surrounded us with a mass of people who sent out support letters and worked alongside us on our project day. Others responded to letters with financial support. Wow. We are completely overwhelmed and blessed by you all!

Our friends and family (and the friends and family of these people who volunteered on our workday) were incredibly generous! So many of you demonstrated your love and support of our adoption in a big way. I, of course, recognize that many of our loved ones may be unable to financially give toward helping us meet our goal. That is totally ok! We know your love and support through prayers, comments and encouraging words along the way. However, it has been completely awesome to see how God has moved certain hearts to assist us financially. I think that has been one of the most encouraging and surprising parts of this process—the people who choose to help are not always the ones that you would expect. In fact, many of you are casual acquaintances that simply have a huge heart for adoption. We are so grateful for your outpouring of love.

One Amazing Day: Our Both Hands Project

Last Saturday was an absolutely amazing day. Dave and I were completely stunned and encouraged by the love and support that our friends showed us in coming out to work on Beverly's home. Each of these friends were loving us in such a personal way: they had each sent out support letters and now were working alongside us to help us to bring our baby boy into our lives.

Our good friend, Jeremy, has put together a video documenting our day. Enjoy!
Although our project day has passed, you can still help us with our final project. You see, this Both Hands project has two parts. One major part was what we did on Saturday-helping widow Beverly to fix up her home! Our mission is accomplished for Beverly. However, the second major part of our project is the hand for the orphan, our future child. If you would like to be apart of offering a hand of help financially to our orphan--you are more than welcome to help! Find more information here on how to give directly to our project: http://bothhandsfoundation.org/marriott The deadline for our project giving is July 12. 

We are praying that God will use this project to raise the majority of the remaining $15,000 that we need to bring our boy home. Join us in living out our faith! Thank you for your prayers, help and support along the way. We can't wait to see what else God will do on this journey of faith.

Letters to My Boy

Hey Bud,
This last week has been a pretty tough one for me. I have said goodbye for the last time on earth to one of my dearest and best, my grandma. I had hoped that she would get the chance to know and love you too, but God had other plans. I want to share with you a little bit about this wonderful woman, who has taught me so very much.

A few months back, my Gram listened excitedly as I told her about our plans to adopt you and bring you home into our family. I had been a little nervous, as I wasn't sure how she would respond. Gram and Grandpa grew up in a different time. I prayed that God would give me wisdom and clarity as I shared our exciting news. And as soon as I explained what Daddy and I have been doing to bring you home, a smile spread across her face. I will never forget that.

Gram continued on to share in my joy. She described how welcoming and loving her family had been over the years, even when not everyone was accepting of other people that didn't look exactly like them. She told story after story, and I listened with relief and joy. She was so excited to meet you!

My gram was a very special lady--one of a kind. She was absolutely beautiful, inside and out. She was full of life and spunk. She was funny and sweet--but she always told you like it is. Grandma and Grandpa have really grown a stunning family too. Through thick and thin, they've braved the last 58 years together. They've raised five children, and loved all who've entered their doors. They have taught us all that family is important. Family sticks together. Family stands up for one another. Family is patient. Family is forever.

Your great-gram has been battling cancer for the past few years. She was a fighter. She was strong. Last year, she had surgery to remove her caner-filled lung. The doctors thought they were successful. We thought that she was doing much better, but we were wrong. The cancer came back with a fury. The doctors told her that there was little chance that she would survive. These past few months were very hard on her frail body, and last weekend she went into the hospital.

The cancer had run its course. Each of us took turns staying with Gram while she was in the hospital that weekend. During the day, our huge family overran the hall outside of her hospital room! The hospital had to move her to a different room that had a waiting room right next to it, just so we could all have somewhere to stay. At night, we stayed by ones and twos, holding her hand and singing her songs until she drifted off to sleep. That time with her was so sweet. The woman who had cared for me when I was sick as a child, I now cared for her in her illness and pain.

We knew she did not have long, and we just had one goal for her: We wanted her to come home. She wanted to come home. We worked hard to bring her home, to the place she loved.

Within just a few hours of resting at home, it became clear that her time was coming. Our entire family gathered around her. Grandpa held her close in his arms. Together we prayed and sang to her one last time, Amazing Grace.

Amazing grace,
How sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me.
I once was lost,
But now am found.
Was blind, but now I see. 

From the center of this beautiful, loving scene, my sweet Gram left this earth and went home to heaven. No more to suffer the pain of a broken world. Now she is with Jesus.

My heart has ached this week so very much. I have cried many tears. I have missed my dear Grandma. I have longed to be with family, my family. That's you too, buddy. Can't wait until you're home with me, love. I so wished you could have met your great Gram...I suppose now that will have to wait until heaven.

Sponsoring Our Both Hands Project

An Unexpected Delay

Our expectation was to receive a referral and then travel to Ethiopia fairly soon to begin the court process. If all went well, we were hoping to have our little boy home by the new year. That being said, we were not expecting the news that came out of Ethiopia yesterday.

The Ethiopian government has made a decision which requires adoptive families to complete a Pre-Adoption Immigration Review (PAIR). Completing an international adoption through Ethiopia requires legal actions by both the Ethiopian and the American governments. Sadly, on a few occasions, adoptive children were cleared by the Ethiopian court (thus granting the adoptive family official parental rights) only to have difficulty being approved for immigration by the United States Embassy. From the best I can understand, the soon-to-be implemented PAIR process adds a pre-approval step to the process of US immigration, which practically guarantees for the Ethiopian government that once an American couple is declared by them to be the legal parents of an Ethiopian child, that the adoption will indeed be completed from an American perspective as well.

The bottom line is that we were informed by our adoption agency that this new policy will certainly delay our adoption plans at least 3-4 months. Naturally, we are disappointed. Nevertheless, I had just preached 2 Corinthians 12:7-10 to our church this past Sunday morning (recording here). During this sermon, I told our congregation: "If you are a Christian, there is nothing that can happen in your life that does not flow from and is not attached to the good purpose of God." But living according to that truth requires that we walk by faith, not by sight –– focusing our attention on the truth that God has revealed and not on the circumstances before us. The same faith that we are trying, albeit imperfectly, to put into action by adopting a child — this faith is now being tested by God as our adoption plans have been substantially delayed. We want to maintain a big view of God's sovereignty in the midst of this delay. It is a joy, then, for Emiley and me to consider the following:

• God has graciously seen fit to keep Ethiopia open for international adoption. As far as we know, our plans have been delayed for a few months, not cancelled altogether. 

• God is for us. He proved that when He gave up His own Son for our forgiveness of sins and adoption into His family (Romans 8:31-32). 

• God is for orphans and for adoption. He cares more about the fatherless than we ever could! So we rest in the care that He has for our little one, even if we cannot personally care for him as quickly as we would like to (Psalm 68:5). 

• God's timing is always better than ours, so we rejoice that this situation is in God's complete control and is intended by God for our good. This delay, then, is intended at least in part to draw us closer to our God and to deepen our trust in Him (Romans 8:28-29). 

• This delay allows us the opportunity to keep the topics of physical and spiritual adoption at the forefront of our conversations with others –– perhaps in a direct answer to our prayers that God would use us to encourage other Christians to adopt as well as to communicate the gospel to those non-Christians who have not yet been adopted into God's family. 

• From a practical perspective, this delay will allow us more time to get our adoption finances in order. 

And these are just the things that can we see God doing in the midst of this disappointing circumstance. But as John Piper has often said, "When God is doing one thing, he is doing a million things." In many situations we do not see even one thing that God is accomplishing, so by the same faith, we must trust that He is working a countless billion things for our good and for His glory. However, in this situation, we can see several things that God is working for our good; it only thrills our hearts further to consider by faith that He is always doing so much more! 

Just Jump!

During this season of waiting, we are keeping ourselves busy with life  raising the funds needed to bring our boy home. I am completely overwhelmed by God's gracious provision to this point. Over and over and over again, He has provided the needed finances to proceed with each step of this journey. No, we have not had the money up front--but just enough for us to keep walking by faith. Often, this is just how God works. Because the point is that He wants us to walk by faith.

There have been a few points along the way where we have thought that we might have to freeze our progress and take a few months off to save up money. Other adoptive families and friends have encouraged us to just keep walking...to only stop when the door slams shut. The worst that could happen is that we'd move through the process more slowly. We've continued forward by faith, and guess what, God has provided each time--just in time.

Ok-I just want to give a shameless plug. Maybe you've been reading this blog because you are interested in adoption too. Maybe you would love to adopt a child, but the financial hurdle seems insurmountable. I want to encourage you, friend. God owns it all. He has promised to care for the fatherless. He has promised to care for you. Now, I am not trying to encourage reckless abandon. Be wise with your finances. You should not bring a child into your home unless you have the sufficient finances to feed, clothe and care for him.

BUT-If the finances are the only thing stopping you-the financial cost of international adoption-then just jump! 

It might take a while. Your timeline might move slowly. There will surely be roadblocks along the way. But there are countless grants, low/no-interest loans, and creative fundraisers that you can do to make this possible. If God is working in your heart to adopt a child, and you have the ability and means to care for that child once he's home--Jump! :)

You see, adoption is a picture of something far greater than even adding an orphan into a family. It is a picture of the Gospel. Our adoption as sons. You want to talk about great cost? Let's look at how much our adoption into God's family cost.

While it costs us a lot to adopt children, it cost God the blood of His own Son. It cost Christ to give up His whole life, in obedience to the Father. Christ, the One who 'endured the cross' came to redeem us and make us part of the family. Orphanology

Be moved by that. Because that was the cost of your adoption. But as Christians, we are no longer orphans. We are sons. We have been gloriously adopted into God's family, giving us a part of His inheritance and a seat at His table.

So back to the picture/shadow of our adoption. There are 147 million orphans in this world, over 5 million in Ethiopia alone. God has commanded believers to care for the fatherless. How are you obeying that command? The command doesn't mean that every family is supposed to adopt, but it does mean that some of us are. Let's be a Christian community known for our love and care for one another and the least of these. Let's make it popular. Let's do it. Because we, of all people, have a great motivation.

"The deepest and strongest foundation for adoption is located not in the act of humans adopting humans, but in God adopting humans. And this act is not part of his ordinary providence in the world; it is at the heart of the Gospel." John Piper, Adoption: The Heart of the Gospel

A Novice's Look at Traveling Internationally

Last year at this time, Dave and I were preparing for our missions trip to Africa. My heart is just longing to return to Africa. :) To fight off the desire for travel, I have decided to share a couple of excerpts from our last trip to Africa. Below is the third journal entry from our travels.

I awoke in Paris this morning to Dave's smiling face--"Today we go to Benin!"

We quickly and excitedly packed our bags and prepared for our day's journey. Before we bid farewell to Paris, we look forward to meeting up with a few friends for coffee. These two friends of ours from the USA have just finished a missions trip to Turkey and are now traveling across Europe. Today, we meet in Paris!

We enjoyed our fellowship with these brothers. They have been earnestly seeking open doors of opportunity to speak the Gospel, in a country that is ruled and governed by Islam. They shared stories of Gospel opportunities that they have had already. We listened with excitement. I am thankful for these brothers who have been faithfully ministering the Gospel. Thankful that they too recognize that a trip abroad is not simply for leisure and enjoyment, it is sovereignly ordained by God to direct us to those who have yet to hear the Good News. As we parted ways, we pray together for open doors on our continued journeys.

We took our luggage in a taxi to catch our first train. Our Muslim taxi driver was very kind. It is interesting to be surrounded with so many religions and nationalities. I wish that there were no language barriers, so that we could clearly share the Truth with this man.

Next, we braved the train system. What a task to get through the subway connectors with four bags-constantly watching out for pickpockets and thieves. After many transfers and mishaps, we were finally on the train that would take us to Airport Charles de Gaulle.

We sat down on the train next to a Beninois man, Yaovi. He was ecstatic to find that we were headed to his home country. We immediately became his friend. This is the African way. :)

He would be traveling back to Benin within the week, and he wanted to meet up with us when we were there. In fact, we learned that we are staying in his exact neighborhood! Again, we are reminded that these meetings are not by chance.

Our new friend was pleased to help us navigate through the airport, directly to our terminal. Unfortunately, as we waited, we were met by other Beninois men who wanted us to travel with their bags (illegal contraband). We refused. Suddenly those robot reminders that constantly play over the loud speakers in our American airports don't sound so foolish, "Do not leave your bags unattended. Do not agree to take anything from a stranger to put in your bag. Etc."

In the airport, we passed a man whose shirt said, "Christians to the Lions." Chills ran down my spine. I was no longer in America. What a hatred! Again-never before have I experienced this hatred directed at me for my faith. We live in a safer, tamer world in USA. But, oh how desperately, this darkness needs the light of the glorious Gospel to shine.

Customs and security was FAR easier than in USA. We headed to our gate, grabbed a bite to eat, and began to board for our flight. They packed about fifty of us onto a small standing bus for transportation to our flight. The rain was pouring down and the bus was hot and sticky. We were packed like sardines on the tiny bus. For twenty minutes, the bus sat stationary with its restless inhabitants, waiting to load our plane. There were enough passengers to fill about 20% of the plane. Finally, we were released to run through the rain and board the plane.

Our flight was fairly uneventful, and after about 6 and a half hours, we landed in Benin. Cotonou, Benin, is a city on a swamp. As we were descending, we flew over a lake that was dotted with fishing nets. Upon landing, we soon found ourselves descending the stairs from the plane into a humid 85 degree evening. My heart was bursting with excitement. Since I have been a child, it has been my dream to travel to Africa for missions. I have finally come.

We were corralled into a very small "airport" to wait in line for customs. In order to enter the country, you must have a yellow paper in your passport that confirms that you've been inoculated with the yellow fever vaccine. If you had not, the men (armed with filthy latex gloves) at the end of the customs line would do the job for you. Boy, am I glad we came prepared!

We passed easily through customs and were greeted by a man who would help us get our luggage. After securing our baggage, we made our way past the armed guards, who were busy picking through everyone's luggage. Literally, they were opening every piece of luggage and rummaging through its contents. Wow. Our helper simply mentioned that Dave was a pastor, and the guards waved us right past the line and through the interrogation.

Here we were greeted with the beaming smiles of Missionaries Ken and Debbie Haley as well as their first national pastor, Pastor Michel. I have never seen a smile as big as Pastor Michel's--truly the joy of Christ radiates from this man. Dave clearly loves these dear friends-I look forward to getting to know them and serving alongside them during this trip.

After thanking God for safety during the trip, Pastor Michel jumped back on his motorcycle (or moto, as they call them here) to head home to his family. We traded in some of our American cash for the Benin currency. We loaded up our luggage and got into the Haley's LandRover truck to get a bite to eat on our way home. A few minutes away from the airport, we popped the truck up onto the road median and parked alongside the other vehicles. We passed the restaurant guards and headed into the restaurant. We ordered pizza, fries and water to hold us over 'til morning. Not the cuisine I was expecting for our first meal in Africa, but it was welcomed after the long day of travel! We followed the doctor's orders and only drank water from a water bottle--taking precautions to avoid parasites and diseases. The food was excellent and the service kind! We tipped our guards (as is customary) on the way out and we waited for our chance to dart through the quickly moving motos to get to the truck.

When we got back to the truck, Debbie joked that we would be taking a "bumpy road" to get to their apartment--bumpy roads were Dave's favorite on his last trip because he was constantly hitting his head on the window as they rode over these bumps, an ongoing joke among these friends. We weaved in and out of the flurry of motos, autos and pedestrians. Ken warned us not to make eye contact with the police, who lined every round about, as they like to pull you over for an "offense" for which you are often innocent. Their hope is to get a little extra cash out of you to line their pockets. Soon we pulled onto what I thought was the bumpy road, a cobblestone road which jostled us as we rode. About two minutes later, we pulled onto the real bumpy road. We were literally bouncing in the air off of our seats as we took the road to their house. I was amused that no one else (Dave included) seemed to take notice of the roller coaster ride--so this is Africa. :)

We drove into a neighborhood past poverty that I had never seen. Cooking fires dotted the landscape and white eyes peered at us curiously through the darkness. As we drove deeper into the neighborhood, 2-3 story apartment building started to appear within the seeming rubble. We soon arrived at the Haley's gated driveway. Debbie jumped out of the truck to open the rickety gate, and we pulled up to their apartment building. It was two stories tall. The national landlord lives on the bottom floor and the Haleys live on the second. As we stepped out of the car, 2 or 3 lizards scurried out of our path. Lizards-the non-poisonous kind that don't bite-these are one African crawling creature that I don't mind one bit. In fact, they are kind cute. :)

The Haley's showed us around their two bedroom, two bathroom apartment. Although it is simple, it is far more spacious than I expected. It is also immaculate! This is not nearly what I had imagined. I guess I wasn't exactly picturing that they'd live in a hut, but I wasn't expecting spotless tile floors. Debbie is an excellent housekeeper.

They took us up to their rooftop terrace to get a bird's eye view of the neigborhood. I was stunned to see that long with their "wealthy" apartment-dwelling neighbors, they shared the block with dozens of "tin huts." These are simply constructed, rectangular buildings which house four to six families each. The structures cannot be more than ten by forty-five feet.

It has been a long journey to Africa. It hardly seems like it was only this morning that we maneuvered through the Parisian train system. I look forward to seeing more tomorrow! Until then, with utter excitement and complete exhaustion, I try to sleep.