The Wait.

Many of you have been faithfully asking, "What's next? How's the adoption going? Have you heard any news recently?" Wow, am I thankful for your support and care about our adoption! I wanted to take a few minutes to fill you in.

I so wish that I could answer the above questions with new information! Unfortunately, we really have received no news recently. Trust me, when we hear anything--the whole world will know it!! Right now, we are in the waiting stage (but who am I kidding, this whole thing is a giant waiting stage-one right after the next). 

We submitted all of our important paperwork (dossier) and shipped it off to Ethiopia months ago. We are actually at the time length right now where our agency originally estimated that we would receive a referral (matched with a child). However, that was before there was a big change made to the adoption program in Ethiopia. We are still not really sure how long these changes will delay us, nor how long they will take to actually implement into the program. 

That being said, we recently spoke with our adoption coordinator from our agency to ask about our timeline for a referral. She told us that we would likely receive a referral within the next month or two. We are hopeful. However, we have to totally recognize that her estimate is just that...an estimate. There really is no way for her to be able to completely predict how soon things will be able to happen or if there will be anymore changes to the program or if things will remain stable in that part of the world. We are thankful for her optimistic timeline; however, the reality is that we still really don't know when we will be matched with our little boy. 

Some of you have been asking how the "matching" process works. After all, aren't there millions of orphans already waiting in Ethiopia--what's the big hold up? Welcome to the frustration of the adoption world red tape!

We have signed on with a specific adoption agency (which is how most people adopt). Our adoption agency actually works with three different orphanages within the country of Ethiopia. Our agency has worked hard to develop these relationships with those orphanages as well as to maintain ethical protocol in regards to the children and their adoption. In fact, just last week, our adoption coordinator and a few others from our agency were in Ethiopia visiting these orphanages. Ooohhh--their pictures are glorious!! Anyways, back to how this works. So-as children come into these three orphanages and are in need of families to adopt them, our agency is busy doing their homework (checking on the children's backgrounds, personal stories, etc.). Then they match the children in the orphanage with the families from their agency. 

You see, it's not really like there is a giant pool of all the orphans in Ethiopia, and we just pick one. The process is much more careful and difficult than that. In some ways this is good, as it keeps order and helps avoid cases of unethical child trafficking or adoption of children who are not really orphans. In other ways, this is unfortunate, as it obviously slows down the process...leaving children in orphanages without families for much longer amounts of time. 

So right now, we are waiting. Waiting for more children in need to come into those orphanages... waiting for one little boy in particular to be in need of us. 

A few things factor into this referral decision: 

1) We have specified that we would like to adopt a little boy, anywhere under the age of two. So, we may instantly have a toddler, running through our house. Or we may have an infant and all that goes along with that. When it's our turn, and a child comes into the orphanage that fits those specifications, then we will be matched with him. 

2) There are a few other families ahead of us in line, waiting to be matched with their children. Some of them are waiting to adopt little girls, some little boys, some sibling groups, etc. Some of those families have specified that they would like a young infant, while others have specified that they would adopt a child up to the age of ____ (whatever they choose). Because of those specifics, we don't really have a "number" in line. It's impossible for our agency to really give out those numbers. For instance, if a two year old comes to the orphanage, we could be matched to him right away if those all in front of us are wanting to adopt an infant under one year old. The factors are not really cut and dry. That being said, we are getting close to the front of the line--but that doesn't necessarily mean a whole lot. 

3) Closed Courts. To my understanding, Ethiopia has closed down their court system for rainy season. This usually happens. But it can still slow down other parts of the process. 

So we wait. Wait until we are matched...Until the day when we will receive and e-mail with our little boy's picture and medial report. Sigh. Waiting.

Until then, we are trying to keep ourselves busy with normal life--which honestly is not difficult to do. Some days, the wait is harder on me than other days. It's difficult to explain what's going on in my heart through this process, maybe I'll take a moment soon to write about that...

I'm also working to get other big projects done around our house--the kind of labor intensive projects that are difficult to do when you have a child in the house. You know, deep cleaning, organizing the garage and the basement, sorting through clothes and weeding out belongings, painting the shutters...That kind of stuff. 

I have also been gathering some things for our little boy. I can't really do a whole lot with this, since I still don't really know if I will have a baby or a toddler. So, I am waiting to prepare his room, waiting to gather many clothes (below 24 mo. size), waiting to purchase "baby" supplies. I have gathered a few things--thanks to goodwill, target clearance and my wonderful sister (who has 16 month old twins). 

P.S. Aren't those little gray shoes I found just adorable! I can't wait to have a little boy to fill them. :)

So, since pictures make every blogpost more interesting...here are a few of those things I have been gathering!