Letters to My Boy

My sweet little boy,
I can never quite seem to fall asleep at night without thinking about you and praying for you. Ever since the first day that your daddy and I decided that we would adopt--that we would begin our planning and our search for you--this is how I fall asleep each night. I don't know how long it will take for us to find you, until you are safe at home in our arms, but I can hardly wait. I just keep trying to remind myself that God has it all planned out. I want to write you letters along the way--someday, when you are older, I will give them to you. I want you to know all about your special story of how you came to be my son.

From the beginning, God knew that you would be a part of our family. He has planned out each detail--down to the day that I will meet you. Psalm 68 says that God is the Father to the fatherless. He is already watching out for you. I'm trying to rest in that truth.

We are just starting your adoption process in the United States. We have so many forms and papers to fill out! We even had to be interviewed by someone from our home study agency to decide if we would be good parents for you. Every time I see my family, they ask about you too! You have a lot of cousins who will make great playmates. :) Many of our friends already love you as well. A few of them have even written letters to our adoption agency, explaining why they think we will be good parents to you. You are already loved here.

We still have quite a ways to go before we will be ready to send all of our important papers to Ethiopia, where you will be. But once our papers get there, we will get to meet you for the first time. We will have to wait in line for just the right amount of time--and then God will match us up with you. Then, we'll get to see your face. After that, we'll get to come to Ethiopia to meet you in real person. While we're there, we will have to go to the judge in Ethiopia to adopt you. We will definitely have an amazing celebration with you that day! You'll be officially ours. That day will be like your second birthday. Every year, for the rest of our lives, we'll celebrate that day together. Lucky you-it's like having two birthdays--one for the day you were born and one for the day you came into our family.

After that special day, I am going to have to do one of the most difficult things I can imagine ever having to do. I will hug you tight and cover you in kisses, and then I will have to say goodbye. You see, they won't let you come home with me just yet. I will have to get on an airplane and fly back home--further and further away from you with each mile. I will have to remind myself that God will take care of you--that He is your greatest Protector, not me. But I will come back. I promise. It will be a few more long months of waiting. But then, when I do come back, you will get to come home with me and Daddy.

Until then, I will keep thinking about you and praying for you every night before I fall asleep. You already have your own little corner, deep in my heart. It'll be your spot forever.

With love,
Mommy